Shopping For Shopping Carts

There are several steps to create a successful ecommerce website. First of all, you need to know what you are doing or your success is going to take a long time if it comes at all. If you don’t know anything about web design, Internet marketing, and the like, then it’s best to outsource some of the jobs to have the end product you have been dreaming of.

First of all, you want to make sure your website is well designed and mimics the bigger ecommerce sites like Amazon and Buy. The reason why is because you want to create a sense of familiarity with your customers and if your site looks much like some of the bigger sties then they will feel more comfortable and more likely will buy your products or services. Don’t worry about getting your site confused with any Order Plug Play Pods Online of the big sites. In fact, this might even work out to your advantage! A lot can be learned from the big sites in the way they arrange content and products on their pages as well as the way the shopping cart process works. The reason why is because these big websites have done a great deal of research to find out what works for online shoppers. Take this research and use it to your benefit without having to spend a dollar!

Now, do some research on the shopping carts the other sites use. Which ones work well and are fast? Customers want the checkout process to be fast and for all of their charges to be presented up front, including shipping, before they enter all of their credit card information. Buy being up front about costs you stand to sell more than by “sucking” the customer in. Many online retailers think that they will get the shoppers to enter all of their information and then they will simply finish the checkout process so they don’t have to go through the process again on another site. However, many shoppers get annoyed with this and will simply abandon their cart and move on. Don’t count on getting customers through forcing them through a series of pages in the checkout process and banking on them following through simply because they already invested so much time. Too many ecommerce retailers are finding out this is not the case and that many who do finish the process never shop with the site again to avoid the hassle. Return customers are important and alienating customers is not helpful so it’s definitely worth keeping in mind!

In this article, I want to caution all of us dads out there to make sure we don’t put the “cart ahead of the horse”. You know, make sure first things are first when dealing with our sons. This is a sensitive area because the truth is that many of us guys don’t have a clear idea of how to build a healthy relationship with our boys. The reason for this is because many of us had fathers that were equally uncomfortable in the process of building intimate relationships. It is so true that many of us grew up with dads who were much more comfortable in their roles at work than they were in their roles at home. In general, men have more difficulty than women in developing intimate relationships. This is a well-known dynamic that is common in marriages and in parenthood. Women tend to be more verbal and have a much higher value for relationships than men do. This is certainly not across the board (my wife has often urged me to stop talking… haha), but it is fairly common in the relationships between men and women. The truth is that, if this is not dealt with, that same dynamic carries over into the man’s relationship to his sons. To make matters worse, those sons often struggle themselves with the idea of emotional intimacy and the building of relationships. Therefore, it is not unusual for a father and son to have little idea how to reach out to each other. So, many men just pull away and leave the sons to fend for themselves in the pursuit of manhood. Some men spend time with their sons but do so in a vacuum of silence; neither male knowing what to say. So, in this case, the two males may fix the car together but never say a word more than “pass me the wrench” or “let’s go in for dinner”.

Now, one of the biggest problems occurs when a father demands achievement from his son before he has built a relationship with his son. One of the fundamental truths about boys is that they strongly desire to feel valued by their dads. Believe me, they pine for it. Especially during middle childhood and into early adolescence, most boys will go out of their way to get the attention of their dads. However, if the father has not reached back for his son; whether it is out of self-centeredness, busyness, or a perceived inability to do so, the boy may begin to rebel against his dad. This is often where problems arise.

Many times, a father expects and even demands high achievement from his sons. Often, it is because the father truly wants his son to experience a better life than he himself has lived. Lots of fathers have come to realize the importance of a good education or they want their sons to excel in athletics because of their own unmet needs. It sounds cliche, but it’s true that many fathers want to live through their sons. There is a plethora of men who reach a point in their own lives where they become disillusioned with how far they have come. Thus, they want their sons to achieve at higher levels than they have. It is at this point that they really push their sons to get good grades, or practice incessantly for sports. Men are “fixers” by nature so when the son gets into trouble the first thing many men turn to is stronger discipline. The idea is that they can force their sons to shape up. Boundaries get tighter, privileges are taken away, and arguments become louder.

Here comes the rub: If a son does not feel truly valued by his father, he will (more often than not) resist the father’s attempts at discipline or guidance. Conversely, if a son feels valued by his dad, he is much more likely to take his dad’s advice to heart and, eventually, take the right path. When I say we, as dad’s, need to stop putting the cart before the horse, I mean we must work (and it is definitely labor for some of us) to develop an intimate relationship with our sons BEFORE we drive them towards achievement.

I was lucky in this regard. My dad was a great guy and showed me that I was loved. Now, he was not perfect and I certainly have my own “father wounds” that I’m working to deal with, but I never doubted that my dad loved me. In fact, I lost my father just over a month ago and it has left a void that will never be filled this side of heaven. As I grieve over the loss of this mammoth figure in my life, I am challenged to make sure that my own sons know that I love them as much as I felt loved by my own dad. I didn’t always listen to my dad’s advice and I definitely made bad choices in my early adulthood, but I always returned to my father’s example and legacy. Why? Because I felt loved by him and, in return, he was a man I adored and revered on a grand scale. My life will never be the same here on earth now that he has gone to be with the Lord.

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